I asked Catherine to write a blog post for me to share. She is unabashed
and vulnerable. I hope you enjoy getting to know her as much as I have.
Introducing Catherine Meyers:
Having reached the age of being a Crone, I decided to
write a post about rites of passage, and examine what the term means to me
personally. I believe it is about transitional change. I continue to
learn what this means to me, and hopefully I will always welcome change
with courage.
In particular, I strongly identify with
traditional First Nation people's outlook, and philosophy regarding
rites of passage.
People are always changing. We are either moving forward,
or regressing, regardless of the pace or situation. The one thing that
stays the same, is that life is always full of transition, from birth to death.
My life transitions are particular to me of course,
but like most folks, many did not come easily, were beyond my
control, and some were of my own choice, and decision.
I don't think it much matters what my experiences were, so
much as what my attitude was when they happened, and what I gleaned
from these rites of passage. The lessons learned, helped me to become
a better human being. I always reflect and paraphrase what I heard Angela
Davis say during an interview, when asked about her time in
prison; when you go through difficult times she stated, these
times either break you, or you get stronger.
My attitude toward rites of passage was, and is
everything. I had to find the positive, courage, faith, and trust. When I
couldn't find these within myself, I borrowed them from some one else. I
had to leave put my false pride aside, reach out to others for help, and put my
faith in God.
I certainly understand that much of my behaviour was
already hardwired in my personality due to my parental upbringing
that determined in part, who I would become as an adult woman.
I have had many rites of passage, and I am still
connecting these to myself, as a spiritual being, having a human experience,
who has recently transitioned into being a crone, now reaching the age of
sixty. When I think about this, it causes me to reflect over the
course of my life up until the present, and to take a kind of inventory of
these rites of passage.
I have listed the most significant rites of passage in my
life.
•
The first transition in my life came at the young
age of five, when my brother developed multiple sclerosis.
•
I would be directly effected by two diseases. MS and
alcoholism.
•
At the age of 13 my father left my family, and my brother
had a mental breakdown at the age of 23.
•
My mother and I returned to Nova Scotia without my
brother, and this point I began to get more seriously involved
in substance abuse.
•
My brother returned to Nova Scotia. I quit high
school, and went to vocational school in order to help me get into art
college. I decided I wanted to study art.
•
At 17-18 years of age I moved out of my mother's home
and lived on my own for a period of time in Halifax.
•
At 21 I got accepted into NSCAD ( Nova Scotia College of
Art and Design ).
•
In 1981 I married the love at my life. Four
months later, he was dead from a complications from schizophrenia and brittle
diabetes, that tragically took his life in 1981 at the age of 26.
•
I married again to an abusive, alcoholic man in
1986.
•
I got pregnant twice, and miscarried both times.
•
In the late 80s I re-united with my father after having no
contact with him for 26 years.
•
Joined Al-anon in 1988, found myself in Transition House,
and divorced in 1991.
•
After meeting an Art Therapist, and she introduced me
to The Artist Way. I quit my Youth Care Worker profession to
go riding horses at 40 for a period of approximately two years, and
I got sober.
•
In my second year of sobriety my mother died. My father
and mother came to my first year anniversary.
•
Suffice to say, without going into the messy details,
I was out in orbit for the first four years of sobriety, until I started
to work the 12 Steps, and then things began to improve. I truly had turned my
life, and will over to the power of God as I understood.
•
I got involved with Mediterranean dance ( Beledi )
which means folk dance, or commonly known as belly dance.
•
My father died eleven years ago, and two months later, MS
took my big brother and I was a mess, but I stayed clean and sober.
•
At 56 years of age, I went back to University and
graduated with my Bachelor of Fine Art from Mount Allison University in 2012.
I hesitated a bit in making this list, as part of my post
being so personal, and to some may seem very negative. Yes it's true, much
of it was negative, but in retrospect, all of these experiences, and
events have helped me to become, and to accept who I am mind, body and
spirit. I choose not to let my rites of passage define me in a negative way. I
became a resilient, whole person, that learned to take responsibility for my
own health and happiness. I've learned to accept the things I can not change,
to change the things I can, and to know and discern the difference.
I am grateful for each, and every day of my rites of
passage, for my contented, happy, sober life. Especially I am forever grateful
to those who helped me along the road.
catherinemeyersartist.blogspot
1 comment:
Thanks for sharing a part of your path...admire your strength and perseverance...Many of your "passages" mirrored mine so I can appreciate the many struggles you overcame....I so love that you returned to school at 56!
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